PT Health Life – A couple’s sex life after the wife gives birth may face obstacles. Many couples return to normal “sex” before the baby turns one year old, but there are also couples who can take longer.
Sometimes the reason for decreased sexual desire or no desire for intimacy is the inability to find energy both mentally and physically.
Ms. MC, 28 years old, confided: “Previously, I was not a person with very high needs, but I really enjoyed having sex with my husband and both of us felt more satisfied.”
But since giving birth to her first child nearly 2 years ago, MC no longer has sexual desire, making both husband and wife uncomfortable. The episiotomy scar from childbirth causes pain during penetrative sex, in addition, not feeling satisfied with the body, but MC feels that these are just a few factors causing low sexual desire . Losing sleep while taking care of the baby and being overwhelmed with taking care of the baby also affect her sexual desire. For many months, both husband and wife were very stressed because it seemed like their lives were turning upside down.
that women who show low sexual desire after giving birth often feel alone, but usually, sexual desire comes later. It takes many months, and some people even take years, to return. There are medical and emotional reasons why women may be dealing with “pressure” from their husbands and self-doubt.
1. Why does sexual desire decrease after giving birth?
For many women, many studies show that ” sexual function ” declines during pregnancy and does not return to normal during the postpartum period. Up to 83% of women are said to not want or enjoy sex two to three months after giving birth and 38% after six months.
Studies also show that while sex seems to improve over time, emotional satisfaction appears to decrease, citing inequality in the division of household chores as a factor. popular.
There are several factors that contribute to decreased sexual desire after childbirth:
Body exhaustion: First, sexual desire becomes “weak” due to the mother’s excessive fatigue in taking care of the newborn. Having to take care of children around the clock makes the mother exhausted both physically and mentally, so having sex is no longer on the priority list.
Hormonal changes : Major hormonal changes can make women feel unbalanced during the postpartum period. This is especially true if you are breastfeeding. While breastfeeding, estrogen production decreases, which can lead to vaginal dryness. That can make the wife feel physically unprepared for sex , although using lubricants can help alleviate any physical discomfort.
Emotional setbacks: Postpartum depression is a serious but treatable maternal mental health condition that affects one in eight new mothers. Lack of interest in activities that were previously of interest, which may include sex. Even if they aren’t struggling with depression, the emotional burden of caring for a baby can make it difficult for women to get back in the mood.
Worried about getting pregnant again: Experts advise postpartum women to wait at least 18 months before getting pregnant again. You need to learn about birth control , including birth control pills or IUDs. That can reduce anxiety about having another baby during sex.
2. Cohesion in the relationship between husband and wife
there are changes that women do not expect and even women themselves do not feel like themselves anymore. There is an increase in oxytocin, the love hormone, which causes women to bond with their children but not feel romantic or sexually intimate with their husbands.
HTS, 32 years old, has two children under 5 years old and says low libido is not so much a problem for herself but a problem for the relationship: “It bothers me and it bothers my husband.” uncomfortable”. S. said that her husband’s way of expressing love is gentle and affectionate. She still feels emotional, but when they get close, she feels tired and doesn’t want to do it. “I don’t feel like myself, I feel self-conscious about my body and my husband doesn’t really understand that either.”
Mother of three HL, 38, says that although she doesn’t feel the urge to have sex with her husband, after each session, L feels more connected to her partner. L. said: “When my husband and I do “it”, we get much closer to each other. Therefore, I want my sexual desire to be higher so I can feel that way often. than’.
Women always want their husbands to understand that being in the mood for sex is quite important. L. shared: “For my husband, a sleeping baby would be the perfect opportunity to have sex, but that makes me uncomfortable and uninterested. I don’t want it to be a matter of taking advantage of it, a quick one.” , which I want to be emotional”.
that women with low libido and not having sex regularly can feel unstable and like outsiders, and that’s very common. “That” requires consensus and no coercion. Because low sexual desire can also be the result of outside influences, such as low levels of emotional satisfaction, it’s a good idea to be honest with your husband about what a woman needs. If you want to solve the problem of low sexual desire after giving birth, it is best to see a gynecologist or a sexologist or psychologist for advice.
Focusing too much on penetrative sex rather than other ways to enjoy yourself can lead to avoiding intimacy altogether. The important thing is that there are many ways to achieve orgasm and for postpartum women, this is an issue for both partners, not just the wife. Remember, low libido doesn’t always look like this, it’s just a phase of life. With time and patience, couples can rebuild a satisfying sexual relationship.
